The post that never posted

I've been keeping busy. Works going well although it's been slow. I'm working five days a week now to make monmey for tuition and such. I've given up counting how much bread and milk and jelly i've eaten, I can tell you it's a lot. I need to switch up the jelly flavor or something though cause the pb&j is getting to be too much of the same. I've been out of beef for a little while and I'm almost out of chicken. I've got a lot of music to show for my time here at school, as well as some snot so terribly grades. I'm learning a lot about myself. Although I can't even tell my self what it is, I think I'm discovering what I want, it just keeps getting torn away. The idea of finding exactly what your not looking for and then having it taken, through no fault of your own or anyone elses is the hardest thing I've found here. I haven't been angry, I've been upset but I've lost the feeling of anger, the ability to blame others for things that aren't anyone's fault. I'm not worried. I'm not afraid. I want to be angry. I want to feel the passion that comes with being angry enough to screem, the passion that makes you want to hit something, hard, so it hurts, enough to make you stop thinking about the anger. Cause when you stop thinking about it you can be happy again. I like being happy again. I like me now, I'm a good person, but I miss the self I've lost.